Quotes from Stargate SG-1

Season Seven

Native pointing toward Teal'c: He is Jaffa.
O'Neill: No, but he plays one on TV.

Carter: Our goal is to take out Anubis' new super weapon. It's what gives him a clear advantage over the rest of the Goa'uld mother ships. Now, we've received word from Teal'c that Yu has pledged to bring the full force of the remaining system lords' fleet down on Anubis once we've succeeded.
O'Neill: Okay. Everyone who thinks this is absolutely an insane idea, raise your hand. Come on, be honest.
Everyone, including Carter, eventually raise their hand

Quinn: Well, can't you do some kind of a... keyword search?
Jackson: For what? "Achilles"?
Quinn: Well, that's good. I'm glad to see that your memory's finally coming back. Not to mention your razor-sharp wit.

O'Neill: What's your situation?
Jackson: I'm hiding. What's yours?

Young O'Neill: Hey! I realize it doesn't actually say "colonel" anywhere on my uniform, but it should.

Jackson: Okay, well... There's no easy way to tell you this so... Sam's just gonna come right out and say it.
Sam gives him a look.
Carter: Well, sir... as you know, the Asgard depend on cloning technology...
Young O'Neill: Oh, for cryin' out loud...
Teal'c: You have been cloned, O'Neill.

Loki: Your bodies are similar to our original form thousands of years ago. Using your physical makeup as a template, I had hoped to find a way to construct a clone that could contain our massively superior intellect. My research was unsuccessful.
Young O'Neill: So much for massively superior intellect.
O'Neill: I was gonna say that.

Burke: Okay, my name is Burke and I'll be your guide. Today we'll be looking at indigeneous vegetation of Central America. Watch your step, Ladies. We're not in Minnesota.
O'Neill: Easy.

Guide: Go on. Save your friends.
O'Neill and Burke share questioning looks.
Guide: They owe me lots of money.
O'Neill and Burke: Uh huh. they leave

Bra'tac: Teal'c, are you hurt?
Teal'c: Indeed.
Bra'tac: Where?
Teal'c: My pride.

Jackson: It's okay, it's off now.
O'Neill: Good. That's good.
Lee: At least we think it's off. If it's not glowing qanymore, so...
Jackson: The glowing thing really gives it away. So if it's not glowing anymore it shouldn't be on anymore.
Lee: Do you wanna hold it?
Jackson: No.

Bregman: Eventually I'm going to ge you on film. Even if it's shots you walking away from the camera.
O'Neill: I hope shots of my ass serve you well.

Weir: Is this a joke?
Kinsey: No. hands her a note
Weir: What is it?
Kinsey: A note from the president.
Weir opens the note: "This is not a joke."

Carter: 23 across. What is the weight of boron. You wrote fat.
O'Neill: So?

Carter about Jack's crossword puzzle: The clue for seven down is "celestial body." And he wrote "Uma Thurman."

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