Quotes from Stargate SG-1

Season one

General Hammond: You ever think of writing a book about your military exploits?
O'Neill: I've thought about it. But then I'd have to shoot anybody that actually read it. pause That's a joke, sir.

O'Neill: Oh, c'mon, Samuels. Let me be the cynic around here, okay?

Carter: You know you really will like me when you get to know me.
O'Neill: Oh, I adore you already.

Carter: It took us 15 years and 3 super computers to MacGyver a system for the gate on Earth.

O'Neill: Permission to barge in, Sir?

O'Neill: No, she tried to seduce me.
Jackson: Oh. pause You poor man.

O'Neill: No, sir? Does it say "colonel" anywhere on my uniform?

Jackson: This tastes like chicken.
Carter: So what's wrong with it?
Jackson: It's macaroni and cheese.

O'Neill: Perfect. If any little rocks sneak up on us, we will have plenty of warning.

Carter: I guess I've always had a thing for the lunatic fringe.

Teal'c: You received permission for me to fire my staff weapon in the gate room?
Carter: Oh yeah.
Jackson: Absolutely.

O'Neill: I thought you said it was Greek.
Jackson: Oh, um, Mycenae was an ancient city in the southern Peloponnesus region.
O'Neill: Where's that?
Jackson: Greece.
O'Neill: Why do I do that?

Carter: Are you crazy? It's a paradise.
Jackson: Yeah, sure, have an apple. What could happen?

O'Neill: We'll just have to cross that bridge when we come to it.
Bra'tac: No, the bridge is too well guarded.
O'Neill: No, actually, there I was using a cliche.

Hammond: You know that's my car, don't you?
O'Neill: You should get that window fixed.

O'Neill: Sorry to drop in on you like this, but we were... dead.

Nox: Maybe one day you'll learn that your way is not the only way.

Nox: The very young does not always do what they are told.

Jackson: Hathor was the Egyptian goddess of fertility, inebriety, and music.
O'Neill: Sex, drugs, and rock and roll?

Carter: You didn't think the Colonel had a telescope on his roof just to look at the neighbors, did you?
O'Neill: Not initially.

O'Neill: You wouldn't think jagged bone digging into raw nerves would hurt, but it does.

O'Neill: I think I cracked a rib, too.
Carter: Why didn't you say something?
O'Neill: I was afraid you'd try to put a splint on it.

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