I had a bit of a panic yesterday. Won't discuss why. But I'm doing better. And I just realized that today is the day I retire my April rant.

So consider it retired.

Welcome to Friday night at planetclaire.org. Or as I like to call it, "the hell if I'm working tonight."

So I've been trying to think up a rant. Which is a lot of work. Oh, the irony!

It'll be a year since I moved in here. What a difference a year makes.

Death Cab for Claire is still menacing me, though. And I'm still not winning the Secret War of the Claires. I fought a few damn spectacular battles, though.

The old guy who lives next store and takes 5 minutes to park his truck outside my living room window is no longer taking 5 minutes to park outside my window. He still lives there, but he doesn't park in back. I miss him.

The standard poodle across the alley still barks like crazy for ten minutes before its owner has the bright idea to shut it up.

I still need to do laundry.

I have one of those headaches where my entire head hurts and all I want to do is close my eyes and sit in a dark room.

In other news, not having to deal with The OC quotes tonight, I did some more work on my brand spanking new forums.

We'll see if it catches on. I'm still a day or two away from feeling comfortable adding a link to it from all my pages.

In other news: I spent 8 hours today staring at a computer screen making extensive corrections to books of the Bible. My head is in pain. We'll see how it feels after I finally grasp the concept that I have to typeset an entire Bible alone.

I was headed home today from the ex-office (I have yet to come up with decent terminology to explain my current situation) and a news update came on the radio I was listening to. Apparently the Minneapolis mayor is considering giving out licenses to panhandlers in the city.

At first I thought, Awesome. Giving homeless people licenses would make it so much easier for them to apply for jobs or just generally help.

But no. It's because the cops would have an easier time processing the rowdier ones.

What?

No, really: what? I get that it might make running their identities easier or something. But...

I give up. Stranger things could happen. Like the president pushing heavily for a resurgence of nuclear power.

I'm currently working on a Bible. A Bible, you say? Yeah. ICB version. I did the math. This is at least my 15th Bible typesetting. I think the number's closer to 20, but I can't remember them all.

In mindless news: Constantine got booted from American Idol (yeah I have been watching it). Aside from my general misgivings about the entire concept in terms of the music indistry, I thought he would have gotten further. I liked Constantine.

In even more mindless news: I've watched a few episodes of America's Top Model. Or... whatever it's called. It's mainly background noise. And I find myself disturbed by the potential models' lack of vocabulary. Tonight, no one knew what the word "aloof" meant. Last time I watched, some of the problem words/phrases were "magenta", "Christian LaCroix", and "eating a balanced meal". I forget the rest of the flubbed lines, but man. Way to reinforce a stereotype.

Anyone ever read the book Midnight in the Garden of Good and Evil? No? It's a decent book, despite its popularity.

Anyway, there's a quite wonderful character in that book who has a phrase she likes to use (and I quote):

"Two tears in a bucket, motherfuck it."

And there we are.

So I'm moving on.

More importantly, has anyone else been excited about the Hitchhiker's movie? It still stands as my favorite book. Douglas Adams' sense of humor and writing style is... unparalleled.

Well, it's paralleled, I suppose, but I think it's a rare breed of brilliant comedy, subtlety, writing, and... whatever. It's late and I'm tired.

But what worries me is that in every preview I've seen I don't recognize the dialogue. And that weird cat with the squiggly legs? No idea where he came from.

I just hope the movie stays at least somewhat true to the book.

It's rather cold in Minnesota as of late. Which makes me think of my cabin. Weird jump, yeah?

Yeah.

Mainly because my family has a cabin in a town where the weather is completely unpredictable. We always had the joke: "You don't like the weather? Wait 15 minutes and it'll change."

And it did.

I actually haven't mentioned my cabin on this little page in 3 years.

Which is a shame as I really like my family cabin. A few fun facts:

So here's what I orginally wrote:

My cabin is in rural Wisconsin (Port Wing). During Prohibition it was a bar. They brewed corn beer in the basement and had dribble glasses at the bar for newcomers. They even had a sandwich (The Hilltop) that was an open-faced sandwich Dad still makes. Al Capone and his gang hung out in nearby Cornucopia, Wisconsin and funded the boys club there. Apparently one day Al needed a ride home to Chicago and asked my grandfather to drive. I've seen the remnants (I have shot glasses) and believe the story. I like my family history.

I talked with a client this morning about a project I'm working on for her. More of that in a second.

She woke me up from a dream that took place in my bedroom. I mean, I was in my bedroom sleeping, obviously, but the dream also took place in my room.

Anyway, in this dream, I was awoken out of my sleep by the actor who played BJ Honicutt (sp.?) on MASH, who jumped into my bed to tell me that he went to a Britney Spears concert last night and learned she needed a make-up artist, so since he knew I didn't have a job, he wanted to pass on the info.

Which was weird because I remembered (we're still in the dream here) that not long ago Alan Alda (Hawkeye) had visited me to tell me about another open job with Ms. Spears. It was like website maintenance or something.

After BJ left, I proceeded to start cleaning my room because it was a complete disaster area. I apparently had a party the night previous and we trashed the place. So I started picking up discarded food (there were pancake remnants all over my comforter) and toys (lots of trains) and then noticed that between my mattress and boxpring was a Scattergories box. I looked again to make sure, and Jack from Will and Grace and some other guy just settled in and started playing. I scolded them and Jack took off, but the other guy gave me a hand getting the box out.

Then there was this whole other segment with a children's birthday party in an adjoining room and some confusion over some miniature dolls and I really should just go back to bed because I apparently need more sleep.

UPDATE: I did go back to sleep. And had an even weirder dream. I was living in an apartment building and my friend Shanny lived on the floor below, so I went to visit her. A friend of hers really wanted to pick up a six-pack of beer so I agreed to drive. When we got to the lobby, someone realized they had forgotten something, so we endeavoured to go back to her apartment. Or my apartment. I don't remember.

We got lost and ended up in a ritzy heretofore undiscovered section of the building. Where we couldn't be seen by residents or they would release their attack dogs. Then some other stuff with a small kitten stuck in a heating vent. I won't continue.

And it really begs some questions that I don't really want answered, such as:

• Where the hell did the MASH actors fit into this? I haven't seen an episode in years.

• Where the hell does Britney Spears fit into this? As far as I can recall, I'm not a fan, nor would I be a competent make-up artist. Unless she paid me a lot.

Anyway, back to aforementioned client. I'm creating a Flash presentation for a speaking engagement she has this week. She mentioned that she saw Maroon 5 last night. It took me a moment to remember that this was a band and not a movie or something.

I know I've heard a song or two of theirs but I was surprised to find out that the show was in the Excel Energy Stadium, which is quite large. I would have expected them to be playing, say, First Ave. or the Quest.

So I asked if they were the opening band or the main act. She said no, that the opening band was some group called The Thrills. She got there after their set and missed them.

Sigh. Although I think seeing either band (especially The Thrills) in a stadium would suck anyway. So there.

It's 12:30 AM.

I wrote a rather dull rant about my day. Which involved me working 15 hours on various projects.

So at about 12:17 AM I was flipping through channels. Nothing was really on. Except for The Pixies on Austin City Limits.

THE PIXIES, people. PIXIES!

I knew they had reunited recently. They actually played a show in Minneapolis last year. But I had no idea they were going to be on ACL.

The Pixies.

My all-time favorite Pixies song is Hey. And around the 12:40 AM mark they broke into Hey.

I'm happy.

Although I fear that I missed Wave of Multilation. Best known for being on The Heathers. Or whatever that Christian Slater movie is named.

I'll have to break out my CD.

I was going through panic mode yesterday.

Or thought I was. Until last night around 10 when I really went into panic mode. I started getting emails from a client whose site had gone down due to exceeded bandwidth.

I spent the majority of today trying to get it fixed. Long day.

In other news: I got an email from a college professor friend of mine who mentioned that he had used my site "as a way to demonstrate online persona and community development".

So I'm an online persona. Sweet. Although it weirds me out a bit that my site is being used as a teaching tool. I'll have to spell-check now.

In a way it is a bit of an online community. I've been lucky enough to correspond with people across the globe. Very, very kick ass people, frankly.

I actually even contemplated setting up a forum dealie once I became a home body all day, thinking that it'd be cool to chat with viewers, but I don't think there's enough of a community for it to be all that useful.

In other news: There's apparently a rash of armed robberies for the past few weeks 2 blocks away from me. Sweet. I'm staying in tonight.

I currently have the hiccups. They piss me off more than I care to admit. Ever since I was a kid I've gotten sudden, tragic bouts of hiccups.

The roller derby that is my upstairs neighbor is at it again. It's 1:30 AM. Who stays that noisy 24/7? They must have to actively work at it.

In other news:

Um...

Hitchhiker's is out next Thursday. I'm still excited about that. But it's been driving me nuts because they've used like five different fonts for the various titles of the movie. And they didn't use the green guy. I love the green guy. Hang on.



There he is. Many years ago when I had an AOL account I was lucky enough to collect a bunch of icons of various sorts. And I got maybe 8 from Hitchhiker's. Including a towel. Here's the Stuffit file of Hitchhiker's icons. It's Mac-friendly only. Sorry, Windows users.

More to write as events warrant.

I completed my compilation for Heathrow's going away. My song list:

Working Girls (Sunlight Shines) : Pernice Brothers
The Employment Pages : Death Cab for Cutie
The World at Large : Modest Mouse
Skyway : The Replacements
Dear Chicago : Ryan Adams
The World Ain't Slowin' Down : Ellis Paul
Rocket Man : Ryan Adams and Adam Durwitz
Probably Bound to Happen : Whiskeytown
Windfall : Son Volt
Poor Poor LA : Tim Easton
Outta Mind (Outta Sight) : Wilco
The New Kid : Old 97s
I Don't Want What You've Got (Goin' On) : The Ike Reilly Assassination
The Late Greats : Wilco
As Far As I Know : Paul Westerberg
Deckchairs and Cigarettes : The Thrills
Rock N Roll : Ryan Adams
Take Me With You (When You Go) : The Jayhawks

What do you think? Too trite? Too mainstream? Eh, I stand by it.

Does anyone else dread making mix CDs? I used to agonize over the song list and the order of the songs, trying to create the perfect Zen flow of music. I eventually gave up. I decided it was too much stress for one CD.

So I'm watching Airline. It's a documentary that focuses on... an airline. Southwest, mainly. And they're profiling a radio station morning show that was nominated for an award.

One of the on-air personalities described his outfit he was planning on wearing as a "Jay Farrar shirt that I paid $1.75 for". And I thought, "Jay Farrar! No way! Son Volt rules!"

Until I remembered that Jay Farrar was a brand name found at JC Penney's.

Which made me not so sad when they lost.

A few other thoughts:

• I'm currently winning The Secret War of the Claires. It never lasts, but I like the latest status. Part of the reason I'm winning The Secret War of the Claires is because of the upcoming release of the Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy movie. Which I'm pretty excited about.

The release of the movie, that is. Hitchhiker's remains my all-time favorite book. And Douglas Adams remains my all-time favorite author.

• Heathrow's last day is Friday. My ex-coworker is becoming my ex-ex-coworker. Which means no more lunches with her. I'll miss that. So in honor of her departure, and in honor of the fact that I have nothing to do today, I'm making her a CD. Except I have no idea what to put on it. I'll get back to you.

It's a gloomy, rainy day today. I've hit a creative roadblock on a newsletter I'm designing. Which is due Monday. D'oh.

In an attempt to unblock myself and pander to those readers who have been waiting for my lazy ass to have another Music and/or Storybook Friday and/or Saturday, today's the day I'll post some music-y goodness.

Now, if one of my neighbors were kind enough to have a wireless internet connection, this would be easier. And once I find a nearby coffee shop with aforementioned wireless access, you'll get more music. Maybe Monday.

But for now:

I've come up with a theme. Water. It's been raining all day. It stopped now, of course, but there's still a fair amount of water winging its way down the gutters outside. So let's begin.

It was late when I wrote my last rant. Forgive me. But I still think Spatula City is funny.

I relented. I acquiesced. I gave in.

I did my federal taxes. I did my state taxes.

And now my head hurts.

I am studiously, diligently, and methodically not doing my taxes.

It's quite the task.

I redesigned one of my websites last night. I don't love it, but at least it doesn't look like it was designed by a 12-year-old anymore. In my defense, it was the first website I ever built.

UHF is on. Does anyone else remember this movie? Weird Al, Michael Richards, Victoria Jackson... for some reason we rented it when I was in high school. And for some reason I loved it.

I still like it. And everytime I see a spatula I think, "Spatula City! Spatula City!" Which brings up another point: who the hell came up with the word "spatula"? What's the genesis of that?

I've developed a new game.

Being home all day and having the TV on (all day), you quickly discover that there's not a lot on. I've developed a pretty safe routine. It gets spotty around mid-afternoon, mind you, but I'm still working on it.

So I've started watching the forensics/true crime/cold case shows. I've always loved mysteries, and combine that with police work and there you go.

And watching these, I've noticed that in all the interviews they do before unveiling the killer, they often interview the killer (obviously without revealing that fact). So my new game is to look for clues as to who's actually in jail in an attempt to figure out the killer beforehand.

Oh, they try and disguise the prisoners. They'll stick 'em in the Warden's office, with lavish wooden shelves of books behind them. Or flowers in the background.

Or in the prison library. Or in front of a blue screen.

But you can often tell. They're wearing a sweatshirt or an orange or grey top. Or they're cropped a little too closely. Or the women have no makeup on.

It's kind of fun. Try it sometime.

I've been feeling guilty about pimping my business on here. A girl's gotta earn money, but still. I'm not saying I'm removing the link or anything drastic. But I thought I'd add content. The section most sorely in need of an update is my recipe section.

So I thought I would move from Capitalist Pig to Commie Pinko Liberal:

Last week, as some of you know, I worked the Buster : Sugartime airing in the Twin Cities. And I downloaded some recipes that were related to the episode (I think they were from Amaze, the sponsor of the event). So I'm posting them. Primarily because the Macaroni and Cheese sounded good:

BAKED MACARONI AND CHEESE

3 tablespoons unsalted butter
3 1/2 tablespoons all-purpose flour
1/2 teaspoon paprika
3 cups milk
1 teaspoon salt
3/4 pound wagon-wheel pasta (rotelle), or other shaped pasta
1 tablespoon Worcestershire sauce
10 ounces extra-sharp Cheddar cheese, shredded coarse
(about 2 3/4 cups), or more to taste
1 cup coarse fresh bread crumbs

Preheat oven to 375°F. and butter a 2-quart shallow baking dish.
In a 6-quart kettle bring 5 quarts salted water to a boil for cooking pasta.

In a heavy saucepan melt butter over moderately low heat and stir in flour and paprika. Cook roux, whisking 3 minutes and whisk in milk and salt. Bring sauce to a boil, whisking and simmer, whisking
occasionally, 3 minutes. Remove pan from heat.

Stir pasta into kettle of boiling water and boil, stirring occasionally, until al dente. Drain pasta in a colander and in a large bowl stir together pasta, sauce, Worcestershire sauce and 2 cups Cheddar.

Transfer mixture to prepared dish. Macaroni and cheese may be prepared up to this point 1 day ahead and chilled, covered tightly.

In a small bowl toss remaining 3/4 cup Cheddar with bread crumbs and sprinkle over pasta mixture.

Bake macaroni and cheese in middle of oven 25 to 30 minutes, or until golden and bubbling, and let stand 10 minutes before serving.

Serves 8 Children.
Gourmet, May 1995

BAKED BEANS with MAPLE SYRUP
The beans need to soak in water overnight,
so start this recipe at least a day ahead.

1 pound dried pinto beans (2 1/4 cups)
12 bacon slices (about 8 ounces), cut into 1/2-inch pieces
8 cups water
1 1/3 cups chopped onion
1 cup ketchup
1/3 cup pure maple syrup
1/4 cup apple cider vinegar
1/4 cup dry mustard
2 tablespoons mild-flavored (light) molasses
2 bay leaves
1 1/2 tablespoons finely chopped garlic
1 teaspoon salt
1 teaspoon ground pepper

Place beans in large bowl. Add enough water to cover by 3 inches. Let stand overnight. Drain beans; set aside.

Preheat oven to 350°F. Cook bacon in heavy large pot until crisp, about 8 minutes. Add beans and all remaining ingredients to pot. Bring to boil.

Transfer pot to oven. Bake uncovered until beans are tender and liquid thickens, stirring occasionally, about 4 hours. (Can be made 1 day ahead. Cover and chill. Bring beans to simmer before serving.)

Makes 8 side-dish servings.
Bon Appétit, June 1998

AUGHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!

Ahem. I'm done working for the night, I think. I haven't totally decided:

• Work 9 to 6ish Monday through Friday, dealing with constant chaos, clients who change things a thousand times and then change them back... oh so many things. But with a steady income and benefits.

• Work *ahem*11-ish to anywhere from 9-3 AM with no steady income, expensive insurance, no 401K, and no one to talk to other than myself. But with no one to annoy me other than myself. Plus the ability to handle things the way I think they should be handled, and the ability to watch TV all day while doing this.

I'll let you know what I decide.

I keep writing rants and deleting them because they suck. So, I will just summarize:

• There is nothing more exciting than spending a Friday night building a WYSIWYG relational database.

• Allergies really suck. Especially when you're mildly allergic to cats.

• I forgot Dr. Jackson (Stargate) has the same North Face jacket I do. Same color and everything. It weirds me out when things I have show up in TV shows (Rachel Green I'm looking in your general direction).

• Every time I mention that I should really get my taxes done, people look at me in utter shock and awe. I'm getting around to it, okay?!?

Well my site's still up and running. Woo hoo! My saga:

11:00 pm : purchase hosting services for newest site
11:10 pm : change DNS settings with domain holder for new site
11:30 pm : realize that not only is this site's mail down, but so's the entire site. No access. Big problem
11:40 pm : after panic subsides, check DNS settings on this site. Not even close to correct. Panic again that I accidentally changed those as well. I change them back. Acutely aware of the fact that DNS changes could take up to 72 hours.
11:50-1:00 : try desperately to get someone in support on the phone.
1:10 AM : someone picks up the phone. Turns out lightning took out their offsite servers and some were still down.
1:30 AM : site comes back up. I thank the tech gods.

Long story longer: spending two and a half hours trying to fix something that's out of my hands is not fun.

I think I have a love/hate relationship with technology.

As per usual, it's 3 AM and I'm up. Working from home seriously screws with your sleep schedule.

But I am very close to launching my newest site.

ANYWAY: As of per late, I have noticed a marked increase in traffic to my Hitchhiker's quotes page. Which does my heart no end of good.

So I get to have a Hitchhiker's rant.

In high school, I read Hitchhiker's for a book report or something equally dorky. And fell in love. So I bought every Hitchhiker's book I could find. I have maybe 4. Including the complete (increasingly ill-named) trilogy and the Illustrated version with a nice shiny cover. Plus I had a role-playing game for Macs that disappeared somewhere along the way. I always got killed on the Vogon ship.

If you've never read it, I recommend it. It's the most brilliant book ever. The humor has such a subtle brilliance that I would read it every year just to discover nuances that I had missed originally. It's my favoritest book ever.

The author, Douglas Adams, continued to write books after he finished the HHGttG series. But there was just something about the first book that was just sheer genius.

The reason for the increased traffic and for my thinking about the genius that is Douglas Adams is because for the past few years, rumors and innuendo have swirled around regarding a Hitchhiker's movie. They originally had a BBC radio show with the story, then the book, then a BBC television series. So there have been many incarnations of the book/radio show/TV show.

But finally rumors of a movie.

Sadly, Douglas Adams passed away a year or so ago, so he never got to see the movie, but I always heard rumors that he was on set for some of the shooting.

I'm prattling on about this because 1) I adore this book and 2) as of Monday I saw a movie trailer for the movie. I about lost it. I'm so excited.

A few observations:

• Arthur Dent: looks as I would expect him to.
• Ford Prefect: I hope they explain the joke behind his name. Adams always was worried that it was lost on American readers.
•Zaphod: Not what I envisioned. Although a friend who is a big fan (or bigger fan) than I said that was exactly what he pictured. It bothered me at first that his second head wasn't always apparently visible, but in terms of making it look semi-real, probably the best plan. And he still has three arms. nicely played.
• Marvin wasn't what I would have pictured, but come to think about it I'm not sure what I pictured. So I like it.
• Slartibartfast has always been a favorite character:

He continued: "I should warn you that the chamber we are about to
pass into does not literally exist within our planet. It is a little too ... large. We are about to pass through a gateway into a vast tract of hyperspace. It may disturb you."

Arthur made nervous noises.

Slartibartfast touched a button and added, not entirely reassuringly, "It scares the willies out of me. Hold tight."

I'll stop.

Weird. I opened up this page to write some thoughts and I had totally forgotten about the helicopter last night.

I'm watching Frontline in fact. A special on a regiment in Baghdad. I'm not getting into that. Other than to say I have a great deal of respect for anyone that fights in war. I couldn't do it.

Can you imagine trying to get home after a long day at work: you're in rush hour traffic with other similar motorists. And armored tanks.

It was weird enough living downtown during 9/11 and watching fighter jets patrolling.

It's 3 AM. There's a helicopter that's been nearby for half an hour. It's loud and it's creeping me out. It's just circling over and over.

Moving on: I've been working on my new website. It's close to making a debut.

Nothing to report, really. Except that I'm tired.

Back to the helicopter. It finally left. It had a really weird flight pattern. And then it started changing colors. It had red lights, then it went to green.

I know having helicopters in the air are nothing strange or new, but it was circling for half an hour, people. I had visions of Cops police chases circling in my head.

It's Odds & Ends Sunday, which means I get to ramble. Bear with me.

I think Daylight Saving has screwed with my schedule.

I've spent the day (well the latter half of the day) working on my new site.

And now it's 11 PM and Cops is on. It's rather curious, as they played the entire opening song in the... opening credits. And they're overexplaining things. I'm guessing it's one of the first episodes. Woo hoo! Early Cops!

And it's a bit weird. Right now there's an argument between a cop and his wife about his not wanting to talk about his adventures on the job.

Burns: ...and this adorable little hat.

On tonight's Simpsons, Homer—whilst in prison—got a little hat a la Adebisi. Cracked me up. I love it when my favorite shows collide. And I'm thinking some Simpsons writer is definitely an Oz fan:

from a promo... never actually in the episode
Homer: You have enough blame to be on Oz, Jr.! to himself Idea. Make a show called Oz Jr., but don't show it to ABC. They're idiots!

Fun Facts about Adewale Akinnuoye-Agbaje (Simon Adebisi) :

• Masters in Law from the University of London.

• Had an early career in modeling

• Makes playing an evil, calculating badass look easy

Okay, I got an email today that pissed me off. And I think I sent a rather too-grumpy email back. Sorry. I'm sure cosmic forces will smack me in due time.

I've written and rewritten thoughts about this. And every time, I get clearer-headed and realize I really shouldn't bitch.

But this email I got today takes the cake. Somebody told me that half my OC quotes were wrong. At least I think that's what they said. The misspellings were abundant. And punctuation was not a friend.

And it's been bugging me (obviously). Why would a person send that? Just a broad criticism about something I put a lot of money and work into. I check and recheck quotes every week. Half are wrong? HALF?

If you're going to level that accusation, prove it. Better yet, if you're not happy with my site, go to the official OC website. They have quotes. And since they often make mistakes, email them as well.

I did an approximate count:

293 quotes on The OC's first season (not counting the ones that appear on character pages but not on the main page)

237 quotes on The OC's second season (not counting the ones that appear on character pages but not on the main page)

530 quotes on one TV show. Holy crap I have no life. I had no idea I had so many. In theory, I actually have maybe over 700.

So, that means that 265 of them are apparently wrong.

I'll get right on that.

So every time I talk about this I get smacked down. But I suppose I'll talk about it anyway.

I'm currently winning The Secret War of the Claires. It's a long-standing and, frankly, one-sided war, but all the same. It's funny though, because the links vary day by day. Sometimes it's an OC page, sometimes it's a Queer Eye page, sometimes it's Hitchhiker's, and sometimes it's my home page. I never know what to expect. Or why I care so much. I would blame spending 90% of my time in my little apartment as the reason, but the war developed before I started doing strictly freelance. So it's just a personality flaw.

As regulars (may) know, I tend to obsessively check my access logs. Mainly, actually, for 404 errors and hotlinkers. And this morning someone apparently viewed all my rants. Which freaked me out because they're generally full of misspellings and missed words and missed links. So I had no choice but to edit them. Well, some of them.

My mom is threatening to visit tomorrow, which means cleaning. I hate cleaning. I may have a small apartment, but it's still annoying.

Moving on. There's some show on the 100 greatest TV characters. I started watching in the upper 70s or so. And one of the 100 was a character from St. Elsewhere. And as the actor was talking about his role, I was yelling, "Tom Fontana! Cut to Tom Fontana!" And they actually did. Woo hoo!

Which started me thinking about Fontana's other shows (like Oz, Homicide, The Jury). I was thinking it was such a shame that the likelihood of any of those characters being recognized was slim. So I wandered off to do dishes. Maybe 12-24 characters later, I heard a snippet that made me wander (quickly) back into the livingroom.

Frank Pembleton was on the screen as one of the 100. YAY! Andre Braugher did such an amazing job portraying Pembleton.

Unfortunately, I don't think Ryan, Vern, Chris, or Toby are going to show up.

And we're moving on again: See how this works? I have nothing else (that I want) to do, so I type. Fun for everybody!

Anyway, about a month ago, I finally got my butt in gear and submitted a DBA form for PCC to the state. I'm so clueless about this stuff. I had no idea if I even did it right. I called the Secretary of State maybe 5 times to clarify little details.

About two or three weeks ago, I started getting mail addressed to PCC. So I figured, Okay, name approved. But I had nothing from the state to say so. And apparently you have to run two ads in a magazine in order to seal the deal. But I had to send in a copy of my application. Uh... copy?

Which arrived today. It's stamped and signed and everything.

Except it has my old address on the receipt. The envelope had the right address, my application had the right address, but the receipt is wrong. It must be because I *ahem* haven't exactly gotten a new driver's license. Yeah, I should do that. Along with *ahem* my taxes.

Happy April Fools Day. Or something.

I briefly tossed around the idea of doing some sort of prank on the site, but decided I didn't have the time or energy.

Some of my ideas:

• Pull the entire site and proclaim that I now felt television shows were the work of Satan.

• Confess in my rant that I was actually a 50-year-old man who got off on telling people I was a 20... something year-old woman.

• Claim I had been kidnapped and needed as much money as possible put into a PayPal account or I would never type again.

Eh, maybe next year.