QUOTES from Doctor Who

Christmas Specials

CHRISTMAS INVASION

Mickey: Who is he? Where's the Doctor?
Rose: That's him. Right in front of you. That's the Doctor.
Jackie: What'dya mean that's The Doctor? Doctor who?

Rose: Both are beating.
Jackie: What do you mean both?
Rose: He's got two hearts.
Jackie: Oh don't be stupid. What else has he got two of?
Rose: Leave him alone.

Jackie: How can he go changing his face? Is that a different face or a different person?
Rose: How should I know! Sorry. I thought I knew him, mom. I thought me and him were... And then there's this.

Reporter: What about those calling Guinevere 1 a complete waste of money?
PM Harriet Jones: Now that's just wrong. I completely disagree, if you don't mind.

Rose: I must drive you mad. I'm surprised you don't give up on me.
Mickey: Oh that's the one thing, isn't it. You can rely on me. I don't go changing my face.

Mickey: I can't even go shopping with you, we get attacked by a brass band.

Rose: Where'd you get that tree? That's a new tree, where'd you get it?
Jackie: I thought it was you.
Rose: Why'd you think it was me?
Jackie: You went shopping, there was a knock at the door and there it was.
Rose: Oh you've got to be kidding me.

Jackie: I'm gonna get killed by a Christmas tree!

Harriet: I don't think we've been introduced. Harriet Jones, Prime Minister.
Sally Jacobs: Yes, I know who you are.

Major Blake: I'm getting demands from Washington. The president's insisting that he take control of the situation.
Harriet: You can tell the president—and please use these exact words—He's not my boss and he's certainly not turning this into a war.

Harriet: I don't suppose we've heard a code nine? No sign of The Doctor?
Major Blake: Nothing yet. You've met him haven't you? He is a thing of legend.
Harriet: He is that.

Harriet: Ladies and gentlemem, if I may take a moment during this difficult time. As far as the Queen's speech, I'm afraid that's been cancelled. to someone off screen: Did we ask about the Royal Family? Oh. to camera They're on the roof.

Harriet: I have one request. Doctor, if you're out there, we need you. I don't know what to do. If you can hear me, Doctor, if anyone knows the Doctor, if anyone can find the Doctor, the situation has never been more desperate. Help us. Please Doctor. Help us.

Rose: He's gone. The Doctor's gone. He left me, Mom. He left me.

Daniel Llewellynn: What's happening?
Harriet: I would imagine it's called a teleport.

Harriet: Harriet Jones, Prime Minister.
Alex translating for the Sycorax: Yes, we know who you are.

Mickey: Tea. We're having a picnic while the world comes to an end. It's very British.

Rose: Somebody's got to be The Doctor.
Harriet: They'll kill you.
Rose: Never stopped him.

Rose: That's English. Can you hear English?
Alex: Yes, I can definitely hear English.

The Doctor: Now you just wait. I'm busy. Mickey, hello! And Harriet Jones, MP from Slydell North! Blimey! It's like This Is Your Life! Tea! A nice cup of tea. A superheated infusion of free radicals and tannin. Just the thing for heating the synapses.

The Doctor: There's more to be seen than can ever be seen. There's more to do than ever done... Wait, hold on. That's the Lion King.

Sycorax Leader: Witchcraft!
The Doctor correcting him: Time Lord.

The Doctor about his regenerated hand: Of course I'm still The Doctor. And want to know the best part? This new hand? It's a fightin' hand!

The Doctor: Not bad for a man in his jim jams. Very Arthur Dent. Now, there was a nice man.

The Doctor: No second chances. I'm that sort of a man.

The Doctor: When you talk of the Earth. Then make sure that you tell them this: "It. Is. Defended."

The Doctor: I can bring down your government with a single word.
Harriet: You're the most remarkable man I've ever met. But I don't think you're quite capable of of that.
The Doctor: No, you're right. Not a single word. Six.
Harriet: Stop it.
The Doctor: Six words.
Harriet: Stop.
The Doctor to Alex: Don't you think she looks tired?

THE RUNAWAY BRIDE

Donna: Tell me where I am. I demand you tell me, right now, where am I?
The Doctor: Inside the TARDIS.
Donna: What?
The Doctor: The TARDIS.
Donna: What?
The Doctor: The TARDIS!
Donna: The what?
The Doctor: It's called the TARDIS!
Donna: That's not even a proper word. You're just saying things.

The Doctor: Human?
Donna: Yeah. Is that optional.
The Doctor: Well it is for me.
Donna: You're an alien.
The Doctor: Yeah.

The Doctor: He's not a bit overweight with a zipper in his forehead, is he?

Donna: No stupid martian is going to stop me from getting married!
The Doctor: I'm not... I'm not... I'm not from Mars.

The Doctor: With this ring, I thee bio-damp.
Donna: For better or for worse.

The Doctor: Great big spaceship? Hopping over London? You didn't notice?
Donna: I had a bit of a hangover.

The Doctor: You're not special, you're not important...
Donna: This friend of yours, just before she left, did she punch you in the face? Stop bleeping me!

Donna: Enough of my CV. C'mon, it's time to face the consequences. You can do the explaining, martian boy.
The Doctor: Yeah, I'm not from Mars.

The Doctor: Christmas trees.
Donna: What about them?
The Doctor: They kill.

You telling me this building's got a secret floor?
The Doctor: No, I'm showing you this building's got a secret floor.

The Doctor: Only a madman talks to thin air. And trust me, you don't want to make me mad.

The Doctor: I didn't come all this way to talk to you on an intercom.

The Doctor: You know what you said before about a time machine? Well I lied and... it is.

The Doctor: Guess what I've got, Donna? Pockets.

Donna: There's just one problem.
The Doctor: What's that?
Donna: We've drained the Thames.

Donna: I've gotten married, lost my job and become a widow on the same day.

The Doctor: I don't need anyone.
Donna: Yes you do. Because sometimes you need someone to stop you.

The Doctor: Good luck Donna. And just, be magnificent.

VOYAGE OF THE DAMNED

Astrid: How'd you get on board?
The Doctor: Accident. I've this sort of ship thing I was just rebuilding her. Left the defenses down. Bumped into the Titanic, here I am. Bit of a party, I thought, Why not.

Foon: Have a buffalo wing. They must be enormous, these buffalo. So many wings!

Mr. Cooper: I am Mr. Copper, the ship's historian. And I shall be taking you to Old London Town in the country of UK. Ruled over by Good King Wenceslaus. Now human beings worshipped the greaat god Santa, a creature with fearsome claws, and his wife Mary. And every Christmas Eve, people of UK go to war with the country of Turkey. They then eat the Turkey people for Christmas dinner. Like savages!

The Doctor: But um, hold on. Hold on. What was your name?
Banakaffalatta: Banakaffalatta.
The Doctor: Okay, Banakaffalatta. But it's Christmas Eve down there. Late night shopping, tons of people. He's like a talking Conga. No offense, but you'll cause a riot. 'Cause the streets are going to be packed with shopers and parties and people and— beams down to an empty street. Oh.

Newspaper Seller: Look, Christmas before last we had that big bloody spaceship, everyone standing on the roof. And then last year that Christmas star, electrocutin' all over the place, drainin' the Thames.
The Doctor: This place is amazing.
Newspaper Seller: This year, lord knows what. So everybody scampered. Gone to the country. All except me. And Her Majesty.

The Doctor: Bad name for a ship. Either that, or this suit is really unlucky.

The Doctor: If we can get reception I've got a spaceship tucked away, we can all get on board and— oh.
Astrid: What is it? What's wrong?
The Doctor: That's my ship over there.
Astrid: Where?
The Doctor: There, that box. That little blue box.
Astrid: That's a spaceship?
The Doctor: Oy! Don't knock it.
Astrid: It's a bit small.
The Doctor: Bit distant.

The Doctor: First things first. One. We are going to climb through this ship. B. (No.) Two. We are going to reach the Bridge. There. Or C. We are going to save the Titanic. And, coming in a very low Four. Or D. Or that little IV in brackets they use on footnotes. Wine. Well then, follow me.

Astrid: So you look good for 903.
The Doctor: You should see me in the mornings.
Astrid: Okay.

The Doctor: Mr. Copper, this degree in Earthnomics, where's it from?
Mr. Copper: Honestly?
The Doctor: Just between us.
Mr. Copper: Mrs. Golightly’s Happy Travelling University and Drycleaners.

The Doctor: Hold on! Override! Security Protocol 10! 666! 21! 4, 5, 678. Um, I don't know? 42? Um, one!
Heavenly Host: Information: State request.
The Doctor: Good. Right. You've been ordered to kill the survivors but why?
Heavenly Host: Information: No witnesses.

The Doctor: Wait wait wait! Security Protocol One! D'you hear me? One! Okay, that gives me three questions. Three questions to save my life. Am I right?
Heavenly Host: Information: Correct.
The Doctor: No, that wasn't one of them. I didn't mean it. That's not fair. Can I start again?
Heavenly Host: Information: No.
The Doctor: No. No no no! That wasn't a question either. Blimey. One question left. One question left. So. You've been given orders to kill survivors. But: survivors must therefore be passengers or staff. But not me. I'm not a passenger, I'm not staff. Scan me. No such bio records. No such person on board. I don't exist. Therefore you can't kill me. Therefore I'm a stowaway. And stowaways should be arrested and taken to the nearest figure of authority. And I reckon the nearest figure of authority is on Deck 31. Final question: Am I right?
Heavenly Host: Information: Correct.
The Doctor: Fine then. Take me to your leader. I've always wanted to say that.

Max Capricorn: Who the hell is this?
The Doctor: I'm the Doctor. Hello.
Heavenly Host: Information: Stowaway.
The Doctor: Well....
Max Capricorn: Kill him!
The Doctor: Wait wait wait! But you can't. Not now. Max, you've given me so much good material. Like how to get ahead in business. See? Head. Head.
Max Capricorn: Oh, the office joker. No one's been funny to me in years.
The Doctor: Well. I can't see why.

The Doctor: So that's the plan? A retirement plan? Two thousand people on this ship. Six billion underneath us. All of them slaughtered. And why? Because Max Capricorn is a loser.
Max Capricorn: I never lose.
The Doctor: You can't even sink the Titanic.

The Doctor: What's your first name?
Midshipman Frame: Alonzo.
The Doctor: You're kidding me.
Midshipman Frame: What?
The Doctor: That's something else I've always wanted to say.
Midshipman Frame: What?
The Doctor: Allons-y, Alonzo!

Mr. Copper about Astrid: There's not enough left. The system is too badly damamged. She's just atoms, Doctor. An echo with a ghost of consciousness. She's stardust.

Mr. Copper: Of all the people to survive, he's not the one you would have chosen is he? But if you could choose, Doctor, if you could decide who lives and who dies.... that would make you a monster.

Mr. Copper: So Great Britain is a part of Europe. And just across the British channel you've got Great France and Great Germany.
The Doctor: No, it's just France and Germany. Only Britain is Great.
Mr. Copper: And they're all at war with the continent of "Hamerica".
The Doctor: No. Well. Not yet. Um. You could argue that one.

Mr. Copper: You know, between you and me, I don't even think this snow is real. I think it's the ballast from the Titanic's salvage entering the atmosphere.
The Doctor: Yeah. One of days it might snow for real.

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